"Preach the gospel at all times; if necessary, use words." Saint Francis of Assisi

Thursday, November 08, 2012

Isms

Winnie and Ans,

I know you've been missing your conversations with the boys. So here are some Andersonisms and Giovannisms to help until you get home next month and can experience them face to face. 

Gi: "Why did God make snakes squirmy?"

Anderson: "Dad, what do goat testicles taste like?"

Gi: "Hey dad, why do you smell like camboli?"

Anderson: "Dad if I wasn't your son and I was butter would you adopt me?"
Me: "No because you would melt and I would be sad."
Anderson: "What if I was frozen butter?"
Me: "No, you could still melt."
Anderson: "What if I was ice?"
Me: "Nope. Same reason."

Gi: (while wrestling with Garrett) "DON'T CALL ME QUIGS!!!!! CALL ME DR. QUIGS!!!!!!!!!

Anderson: "That shower was so hot it felt like blood!"

Gi: "My eyebrows smell like salsa."

Anderson: "Dad, could the President of the United States use a coupon like this....1 for the price of 79?"
Me: "Maybe, because he's the President."
Anderson: "Imagine how weird that coupon would be!"

Gi: (wrestling with me) "I'm going to sock you bleed out!"

Me: "Hey Anderson did you brush your teeth?"
Anderson: "Yes sir."
Me: "Don't forget you have to go to the dentist today after school. Did you floss this morning?"
Anderson: "No sir. I didn't eat anything crunchy."

Gi: "Dad, is 'smoking cute' a bad word?"

Anderson: (after having a long conversation with Pops on the Ooma phone) "Dad, I have a question for you."
Me: "Okay."
Anderson: "Why does Pops have to be so awesome?"
Me: "I don't know. That's a good question."
Anderson: "He always takes us to get doughnuts. I love you Pops!"

Gi: (on the walk to Sogipa) "I spy with my little eye something that is every color." 
Me: "Everything?"
Gi: "RIGHT!!!!!!"

Me: (seeing Anderson come out of the bathroom after having blood on his hands from  cleaning a bloody nose) "Did you wash your hands?"
Anderson: (stopping and turning to go back in the bathroom) "Why do I have to wash my hands?"
Me: "Seriously?"
Anderson: "Yes. If blood is supposed to be good for your body then why do I need to wash them after I had blood on them?"

Anderson: "Hey dad."
Me: "Yep."
Anderson: "Is the three little pigs and the big bad wolf Shakespeare?"

Me: (going into the bathroom and asking Anderson about the baby shampoo for Gi) "Hey dude, do you know where all this shampoo went? Last week this big bottle was full and now it's almost empty."
Anderson: "Yes it was me. Sorry dad but I made bubble city."

Anderson: "Dad, have you ever seen a midget in Brasil?"

Anderson: "Dad, is it true that there are actually white people in South Africa?"

Gi: (while riding in the car) "Hey dad, I dare you to eat a crocodile!"

Garrett: (while riding in the car) "My name backwards is Tterrag."
Anderson: "Mine is Nosredna."
Gi: "Mine is GIBBY!!"

Carys: "Hey Gi, you have a band-aid on your finger. Why?
Gi: "It had bleed on it."

2 comments:

The Blume Family said...

dad,i think you just EMBARRASSED me in front of the whole AMERICAN CONTINENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Love Anderson.

Anonymous said...

These just made me laugh out loud in psychology class. Woops. Love, ans